Today in church an older father, who happens to be a grandfather got up and shared a great experience that helped me as a young father. Since this month we celebrate our fathers, I thought it was appropriate to share this.
The grandfather explained that he was working on building a deck out by his shed in his backyard when his 3 young grand daughters came over. They are all grade school age and full of energy. He said he completely enjoyed his experience with them as they wanted to “help” him build. He didn’t get 1/3 of the project done because the kids were playing in the dirt, save the worms from getting chopped by the shovel, nails were scattered on many occasions. In spite of all this, he didn’t get angry or annoyed. Rather, he enjoyed the fact that his grandkids were with him.
I thought of myself as a young father. It is easy for me to get so focused on a project that sometimes when my kids interrupt me, I am easily annoyed. I know I can personally learn from this experienced father to focus on what is important. What is important are the relationships we have with others, not the relationships we have with our things.
Jesus taught that if we are His disciples, we’ll have love for others. Surely this example is one of how we can love others as a father.
Grace for Grace 
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June 3, 2012 at 10:02 pm
jks
Yeah, gotta love those older wiser parents who are constantly telling us to stop and enjoy our kids while they are young. Like we really hadn’t noticed that our toddlers are adorable and our kids are precious and we truly prefer to ignore them.
That sure sounds like a good idea to stop and smell the roses, but that old grandfather can complete his project some time when his grandkids go home. A dad who is at work all day and comes home only has a small window of time. I do not feel one iota of guilt about cleaning the kitchen instead of playing with my kids, because we can’t eat if the dishes are still dirty. Our family has to function and that means I actually have to get some work done around here and being interrupted 24/7 for 14 years is very trying.
What I am willing to do is enjoy my children sometimes, and make their needs a priority, but this is not a vacation, people! Perhaps there are parents out there who work all the time, or clean their houses too much, or complete too many projects, or don’t spend time with their kids. So perhaps that advice is good for them. I mean, of course I know how precious my 4 year old’s kisses are and I bask in them every single day, as many times as I can, but at a certain point I have other things that need to be done, and my kids need some structure and order in their lives so they need me to take care of things and put dinner on the table and they need to see the example of parents who work hard to do what needs to be done, as well as sometimes working side by side learning by working together.
Sorry for the rant, lol. And I would really like to tell all those older mothers who swore I would miss the exhaustion infant years once my kids were teenagers let me tell you that I am truly enjoying my older children. It is totally better than when they were babies, so there!
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June 4, 2012 at 4:45 pm
graceforgrace
jks,
Thanks for the honest feedback. You are definitely right that we can’t just let everything go to pot around the house, but we can surely help our kids out by being nice and gentle in our responses to them rather than curtly telling them to get out and away from our stuff….I guess it is the feeling behind it that I am referring to. Sometimes I’m more frustrated with them and it comes out in my tones, when all they want is a few minutes of my time to tell me something. I can surely give them that. But you’re right, we do need to teach them to respect our time as well, and can do that in a soft tone without flying off the handle..
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June 5, 2012 at 10:54 am
Dan
Thanks for the reminder on what’s important.
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