I came across notes from a talk given about 1 1/2 years ago by James E Faust, who at that time was serving as a counselor to President Gordon B Hinckley for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Parts of his talk was on having a healthy self esteem. I will list the 6 keys that he mentioned and share some of my thoughts as well.
6 Keys to a Healthy Self Esteem
Keep your Free-agency
In my opinion, this is one of the only things that we truly have control over. We have the power to decide what we will do in any given situation. I have written about controling our thoughts and how our thoughts shape who we are. If we get in the habit of doing good things and keeping the commandments good things will come our way. If we choose bad things or even go to the extent of using harmful things like drugs, our agency is given away. It is our choice to either choose the will of God or not. Those who choose to live within the commandments of God have a healthier self esteem than those who do not.
There are a few scriptures that point out how humility and meekness bring us joy and abundance. (Isaiah 29:19; Psalms 37:11) Those who feel the love of God and the joy that comes from humbly following Him feel greater joy and self-worth than those who do not.
I know that when I’ve chosen to be honest in all my associations and conversations I feel much better about myself than when I’ve chosen not to. Those who strive to be honest with themselves, their friends, their employers, and all people feel greater self esteem. The big challenge for me and probably many other people is the small “white lies” that creep in there. If I exaggurate a story or build myself up in a way that isn’t necessarily completly true that is lying. Some may say it’s impossible to be completely honest. Maybe it is, but striving to be honest will surely lead to a greater self-image.
Love of Work
I grew up on a farm and learned to appreciate work. I wouldn’t go as far to say that I love it. However, I do know that I definitely feel better about myself when I’m working for a good cause than when I’m bumming around.
Ability to Love
This one is a life-long pursuit and those who are blessed with this ability to give and accept love have much higher self-esteems than those who do not. For years I feel that I didn’t love and respect myself as a child of God. I had negative thoughts about myself and blamed others for some of the bad things I did as a result of not respecting myself or others. Fortuneately the Lord was there for me the whole time and helped me through this. I learned that it is o.k. not to be perfect and to love myself for all my strengths and weaknesses. I’ve learned that love is a choice. In fact, loving others doesn’t come naturally for me. I have to pray for this love every day and I feel that the more I pray to the Lord, the more He blesses me with the ability to love myself and others. To read a list of great scriptures on love and charity for yourself and others, click here.
- Love of God
1 John 4:8 states: “He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.” Therefore, in order to love we must, as Joseph Smith stated in his Lectures on Faith gain a “correct idea of his character, perfections, and attributes.” These attributes can be found in the scriptures and include: mercy, grace, slow to anger, abundant in goodness, constant, all-knowing, and many more. I know that when I strive to show love towards God that I have better self-esteem and desire to do good. I feel more grateful for the blessings that He gives me on a daily basis and realize my dependance on Him.
In conclusion, I realize that we all struggle with varies things and some of us struggle with self-esteem. I know how difficult it can be to learn to love myself, others, and God, but I also know that it is possible to overcome. My hope is that this post helps some of you who may be struggling with any self-esteem issues and that this serves to assist you as it did me. Feel free to share any thoughts you have.