I came across some interesting sites the other day and thought I’d share them for people to see. These stats are rather old (9 years), but they are interesting nonetheless.
The first site shows information on the various divorce rates amoung various Christian denomonations and other groups. The interesting thing is that athiests have the lowest rate at 21%. You can view this site at this link: Baptists Most Likely to Divorce.
Now, you’ll notice on that report that although Baptists are the most likely to divorce, Mormons have a 24% divorce rate, which is only 2% lower.
However, there is one exception: Mormon Temple marriages. Those Mormons that Marry in the Temple have only a 6% divorce rate. You can view this information at this site: In Era of Divorce, Mormon Temple Weddings Are Built to Last. You will notice that this article gives reasons of why the divorce rate for temple marriages is significantly lower. This list includes the following reasons:
- They Date within their Faith
- They Make Sure they’re Committed to their Faith
- They get their Lives Squared Away before Marriage (that’s why I was 30 before I was married! : )
- They Make the Wedding Ceremony Sacred
- They Marry for Eternity
- They Believe the Family that Prays together Stays together
- They Get Help when they have a Problem
- They Believe Children Create a Happy Marriage
- They have Family Home Evening every Monday Night
- The LDS church and active members discourage divorce.
I would have to agree with these statements. The Mormon marriages I’ve seen work apply all of these aspects to their marriages. Those marriages that are unhappy or that fail are not applying these to their marriage.
Do you have any experiences with these suggestions that support these claims? I’m sure the readers would love to hear!
[...] Mormon Temple Marriages have only 6% Divorce Rate Mormon Temple Marriages have only 6% Divorce Rate Grace for Grace [...]
I have a friend that was married both with a civil marriage and a temple marriage 2 years after the civil and he had an affair 6 years into the marriage. They do have 2 kids together as well. They ended up getting a civil divorce. He is now interested in dating me but I had informed him that he is still with his wife as he has not yet received a temple divorce (I would feel like I am helping him cheat as in my eyes he still has an eternal marriage to another woman) He has informed me that the temple marriage is a promise and when he had an affair he broke that promise and that is what God sees. If this is the case, that the marriage promise is no longer there THEN WHY DOES HE NOT GET A TEMPLE DEVORCE???? Is there something that he is hiding from me? Does he just want to use me while we are here on earth, then when he dies he can be back with his wife for eternity? How shallow would that be? I don’t believe that that is what the Lord is all about. Please help me to understand………….
There may be other reasons as to why the temple divorce wasn’t granted. My mom had to appeal for years to get her records removed from the Church. She was technically a “member” on the books, but she didn’t consider herself one. The higher-ups are very slow to get to things sometimes.
Also, there are so many variables and I think the Lord will clear everything up when it’s all said and done.
Pray about things and evaluate things with this guy and if you feel that God approves and if you feel he’s sincere in wanting to date you then go for it.
I’m a bit skeptical though due to the fact he already has a history of being unfaithful. If it were my daughter I’d be concerned.
Omitted is a rather important reason:
10. The LDS church and active members discourage divorce.
Also, haven’t LDS leaders counseled young people not to do #3?
Glad they mention Family Home Evenings!
I’m a huge FHE fan and have an FHE group on the new and safe LDS Ladies Room at http://www.ourladiesroom.com/ if you want to check it out.
Oh, and unfulfilling marriages can contribute to anxiety and depression and the consequent use of prescription medicines, and we all know that those are common in LDS society.
#2 Thanks for the addition of the last reason. I’ll add that one in.
I’m not sure what the counsel is regarding getting your lives squared away. But I do know that Jesus tells us to strengthen ourselves before we strengthen our bretheren. I feel this applies to getting married as well.
First, we need to strengthen our relationship with the Lord and truly come to know who we are. When we’ve done this then we are prepared for marriage.
These are all my personal opinions and experiences of course.
What do you think?
Hi Ann,
Thanks for stopping by and sharing your blog and thoughts on Family Home Evening. I know people from other faiths that have implemented FHE into their families and they feel the same way.
Seriously, there is no source for these statistics. It sounds like a faith-promoting rumor.
#7 Natasha,
Thanks for stopping by and for bringing up the source of the statistics.
Like I said in the post I just happened to come across them on a website while I was reading a book. The book is entitled “Debt Proof Your Marriage” by a Christian author, Mary Hunt. She is the one that brings up the stats in her book that Baptists have a higher divorce rate than athiests do. As I was browsing around the site she suggested, I came across the statistic I shared about the temple Mormons only having a 6% divorce rate.
Oh, and unfulfilling marriages can contribute to anxiety and depression and the consequent use of prescription medicines, and we all know that those are common in LDS society.
Actually, the relevant area is the intermountain west. LDS use less prescription medicines/suffer less depression than those in the general area. People keep moving in, and the trend seems to be associated with the mountains, not the presence of the LDS in them, but it makes for a fast canard to toss of in passing through.
The LDS Church does not counsel it’s members to put off marriage until their lives are “squared away”, meaning education, careers, etc. Neither are they counseled to put off having children once married.
LDS members are counseled to get their educations early, stay out of debt and live morally clean lives, so that when the opportunity for marriage arrives, they will be ready. They are also taught the principle of sacrifice, living simply and within their means, so that marriage and children can come, and that hopefully those children won’t be raised in daycare.
LDS members also have their own guidance from God in governing their own lives.
I would say another reason for the low divorce rate is that many of the men are former missionaries, and nothing prepares a man for marriage better than a mission.
Also, staying active in the Church throughout one’s married life keeps the couple focused on the same goals, further strengthening the marriage.
I think that the statistics for atheists would stem from the fact that they tend to marry after a long period of living together successfully. So I don’t think those can be considered in the evaluation.
It should also be noted (on the negative side – hate to burst the bubble a bit) that members do get divorced without getting temple divorces sometimes. So, perhaps, these statistics aren’t entirely accurate from that point of view either.
I don’t mean to sound contrarian, but these rates seem much lower than what we hear nationally. I thought divorce rates nationwide were closer to 50%, and I thought I heard that temple divorce rates were closer to 25%.
Also, do children contribute to good marriages? I love my children, but it seems that they added a layer of stress and complication that wasn’t there when we were just a couple. I’ve heard that small children can increase marriage stress, but as they get older, they can keep couples together.
I don’t have any sources either, but it seems to me these statistics might have some sampling bias.
#10
I appreciate your thoughts on what it means by “getting squared away.” You are right about what the counsel is that you suggested. However, according to the article in the link posted, the author doesn’t intend “getting squared away” to mean finishing education, etc. Here is a direct quote from his article:
3. They get their lives squared away before marriage.
To be married in the temple–which Mormons believe is holy ground–you
need
to be “worthy.” In premarital sessions, a local Mormon leader sits down
with
couples and makes sure they are living by the standards of the church.
They
are tested on such things as their faith, their relationships with their
family, their sexual conduct and their use of drugs, alcohol and tobacco.
If
they fall short, they can repent, change the behavior and still be married
in the temple.
This serves as an early checkpoint for young adult Mormons who may have
gotten off course.
“That’s my job,” said Fuller, who specializes in counseling young adults.
“I
bring people back into the fold. It’s the lost-sheep concept. And they
understand that if they don’t get their life in order, they can’t be
married
in the temple.”
THANKS for sharing- Dave and I both thought that this was very informational and great news:) It’s always nice to hear positive things on marriages especially Temple Marriages:)
You need to note that the 6% divorce rate is based off of a very old study. The number continues to be quoted despite it’s age.
Recent surveys in the church have shown divorces due to temple marriages to be on the rise, and significantly. The reasons… media, internet, changes in social morality, and so on.
Current studies have the number of temple marriages that end in divorce at only 2% lower than the general LDS population. This is also visible in the rapidly rising number of single divorced people within the LDS church, and the rapidly rising number of Temple Divorces requested every year.
Another note… The original statistic was 6% Temple Divorces, which was not an accurate reflection of actual civil divorces of temple married couples. Even there the number was estimated to be higher.
Note: I am an active member of the church. I was temple married. My wife left me for an ex-coworker with whom she had an online affair. Within weeks of our divorce she was married to him, believing that after one year she could be sealed to him.
Take care, all members and Christians alike who read this site. It is stated clearly in the bible that “God hates divorce”. It is rare that such a strong word is used in association with sin in the Bible. This shows how strongly he feels. If you read on the lds.org website, it admonishes the individual responsible for the divorce to seek deep repentance. A modern day prophet even went so far as to liken Gods view of marriage to a life force, and divorce as a form of murder. All members who are in a divorced state will have to answer for their actions in the final day (no matter the reasons for the divorce). So, have care that you care well for your marriage. And, make sure you have clean and proper comunication with your spouse before you ever walk out the door. For some sins, there can be no restitution. So, the repentance for such sins is not an easy road.
It is a lot of work to get a temple divorce. Many temple marriages get a civil divorce but don’t bother with the enormous task of getting a temple divorce. This is great for those that want to quote statistics for the wonders of temple marriage. When in reality it is just another case of slight of hand dishonesty.
Skooby,
Interesting comment. You very well could be right about people not going through with the temple divorce. As for your “slight of hand dishonesty” comment, I’d be interested in knowing what you mean exactly by that. Do you care to share?
Rate shall be interpreted….
Please read this: http://www.religioustolerance.org/lds_divo.htm
Doctrinally, there is no such thing as a “temple divorce.” Divorce is entirely a civil matter, and the statistics cited above reflect the civil action.
There is, of course, a cancellation of sealing, which event occurs ONLY when — following her civil divorce and a civil remarriage — the female member of the former marriage is about to be sealed to her new husband.
That is a doctrinal matter, not a civil one, and has no bearing on the divorce statistics cited above. Men may not have their sealings cancelled ever. Women may do so only under a very specific set of circumstances.
This statistic is skewed. Anyone who believes that the Temple divorce rate is really that low has never been to UTAH, home of the divorce lawyers. This is a joke.